Mom and stepdad force teen daughter to drive younger siblings around on her own dime, refusing to compensate her for gas or pay her for her time: 'I'm just working on the weekend for money to drive my younger sibling[s]'

Author image for Brad Dickson
Brad Dickson • Managing Editor
Nov 7, 2024 12:00 PM EST

Doing favors for people generally would be met with some sort of reciprocation or thanks, and you would generally expect to be compensated for any of your own resources you might spend helping them. Say, something like paying someone for gas when they've given you a ride or picked you up from the airport. It's not an equal transaction because you're not compensating them for their time or for the service they've provided you, but you're at least saving them from bearing the most direct financial cost of helping you out. 

Of course, parents will always argue that the "service" they've provided you is the roof over your head and maybe even the fact that you exist at all. There is a point to this. However, it doesn't feel fair when it's used against you as a teenager, particularly because you haven't had any choice regarding your or the family's situation at this point in your life; you're still just taking what's been given to you. Of course, you're going to be given more responsibility as you get older. Some of these will, in some ways, be both an obligation to your family and a favor to your parents.

This teen was forced by her parents to drive her younger siblings around, paying for the gas out of her own pocket. Things went too far, and she elected to ride their bike around again rather than be shouldered with the burdensome chore of the "privilege" of access to the car. However, her parents countered by then attempting to force her to drive regardless. Frustrated, the teen shared her experience with this online community, appealing to them to see who was in the wrong in the situation.

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    AITAH for riding my bike instead of driving my younger siblings to school unless I'm paid? I got my license this summer while I was with my dad. So I was really excited to drive places when I got back to my mom's. My mom and stepdad let me use their spare car a couple times. Then said I could only continue using it if I drove my younger siblings to school, picked them up after school, and paid for gas. I said okay. They kind of laughed about it and I didn't get why. Now I realize it's because th
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    Driving my younger siblings to school s ks because they're all difficult to deal with in the morning. I also have to deal with insane traffic at the drop off area at the elementary school and then again at the middle school and then I still have to find parking at my school. With all that I actually have to leave home earlier than when I rode my bike to school or even when I walked.
    via Icy-Bag-9706
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    Then after school I don't get to do anything with my friends because I have to immediately pick them up and deal with the traffic by their schools again. Then I also have to pay for gas. So it feels like I'm just working on the weekend for money to drive my younger sibling instead of money for stuff I want. Even when I get to drive the car to go somewhere I want to it just doesn't feel worth it when I could ride my bike.
    via Icy-Bag-9706
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    So I decided I didn't want to continue driving their car anymore and would go back the riding my bike to school. It's free and it's so much easier. I can get around traffic and I can easily lock my bike up on the bike rack instead of spending time looking for parking.
    via Icy-Bag-9706
  • 06
    My mom and step dad aren't happy because they said I'm breaking the deal and they already rearranged their schedules. The deal was specifically if I "want to continue using their car" then I have to drive them. I don't want to continue using their car. So that's it.
    via Icy-Bag-9706
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    They still were mad so I offered to make a new deal for them to pay me for my time to drive them plus gas. They said no because it would be too expensive since it would be almost $100 a week and they can't afford that, but I don't want to even do it in the first place. The money idea is just a compromise.
    via Icy-Bag-9706
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    BabyLlamaGirl NTA. They were taking advantage of you. Don't let them use you. Stand your ground.
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    No-Personality... Nta They offered you a job you need to pay to do, and get no perks from. That's terrible deal.
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    MarthaT001 NTA I can see you paying for gas for your own use of the car. I can see taking and picking up your siblings for use of the car. No way is it right for you to pay for the gas involved in transporting your siblings.
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    Flumoaxed NTA They were completely using you and making you pay for the "privlege" of being used.
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    PassComprehe... NTA- The deal mom and SD came up for you had no real benefit for you, lots of benefits for them. They had already changed their schedules in anticipation of you taking over drop off/pick up duties which are truly a pain. They're just mad they have to change the schedules back, lose some chill time, and have to deal with your siblings.
    via Icy-Bag-9706
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    Besides, what's going to happen when you go away to uni? They will be back in this situation all over again.
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    YouSayWotNow Ha, they aren't happy because they know they were taking advantage of you and now they're going to have to hustle and do it themselves! NTA
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    Vegetable Busin... Good for you for figuring out out and standing up for yourself! You don't state your age but guessing 16, so time to get a job and ask your dad to hold your money so you can buy a used car. That way your mom and step will have no say in your car usage.
    via Icy-Bag-9706

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teens aita kids teenagers moms parenting dad pregnant reddit thread parent Reddit raising kids Parenting Fail parents children Parenting FAILS
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